So

I was watching "I Used To Be Fat" on MTV and it really made me think. I might be pregnant but if im not then I really want to get rid of this lard. I seriously cant stand my body and from what I hear my hygiene isnt exactly imperative either. How that works I dont know. But maybe if I lose 40 pounds or so I'll seem better. I'm constantly tired and cant ever get myself to want to do anything. I love my job at Walmart and my friends but other than that and my boyfriend :/ there isnt anything enjoyable in my life. It drives me nuts. I dont do anything except get on the internet, watch tv, and eat :/ I dont even have sex anymore cause he just doesnt seem to want me. That and we fight so much that sex is wayyyy on the bottom of our list. I constantly have a headache which reminds me too much of my mom :/. Maybe someday I'll actually want to do something else. Be something else. We are moving into our new place over the next week and then we will find out if im pregnant. If im not its probably gonna make everything get all fucked up again. -sigh- I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. he doesnt have a job and im taking care of everything and it drives me nuts. -sigh- but thats all i can write for now. too freakin tired.