Tuesday, June 7, 2011

One Month Four Days

Sitting in my room with my lost childs newborn clothes I bought. Why Im torturing myself like this i dontknow. Maybe someday I can see it as "it wasnt your time" but right now all i can think is "why?"

I dont understand why I'm not allowed a child. Why the love of my life isnt allowed to
be the amazing father i know he would be. Yes we have our issues and sometimes i feel intenly hopeless.

IT IS NOT FAIR.

Dealing with the pain, the hole in me that just throbs and screams at me that im EMPTY. lost. a part of my soul has been taken from me.


and its excruciating.

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